Feature Article

My Mom - An Unsung Hero
by Cheriees A. Farmer

Terri and I met in 1984, just before my 13th birthday. Terri Collins was a member of the church my guardian was attending. Auntie Carrie had been awarded custody of me since my mom was only 16 when I was born and had never shown much of an interest in being a mother. Terri started to look out for me almost immediately. I was desperately in need of someone. Auntie was a wonderful provider, but she had one big strike against her. She was well into her sixties and had no idea what to do with a moody, smart mouthed, disobedient teenager. Terri stepped in and took on the never-ending task of keeping me in-line. Even when I became completely unruly with my aunt and she could not deal with me, Terri allowed me to live with her for a whole year while I straightened up. After I went back home, Terri, who had by now had her own child, was still spending as much time with me as she could. Swatara (Terri's daughter) has always been my sister. It wasn't until she got older; that she figured out we weren't really related. Terri has never treated me any different. In her eyes and her heart, I am her eldest child.

In 1989, I lost my guardian to a heart attack. Devastated, doesn't begin to describe how I felt. I was sixteen, and I was terrified. I went to stay with my Godfather, his girlfriend and her three kids. That was a horrific year! Almost every penny I received from welfare was given to my landlords. I consider them my landlords because they never took a real interest in me. Whenever I needed anything, Terri was always the one to help me. Terri was now raising her daughter by herself because Swatara's dad was in jail. Terri was also working 2 nursing jobs and going to school full-time. I have no idea when she found time to get any real sleep. I always remember her slumped over a textbook catching a few winks while still in her hospital scrubs. In spite of all that Terri had on her plate, she realized that I was not doing well at my Godfather's, and again, took on the responsibility of raising me.

Terri has always been the one to be there for me. When I was about to be transferred from my college prep school because of poor grades, she was the one that took off work to beg my counselor's to give me another chance. She guided me through puberty, gave me beauty tips and tried to educate me on boys. She was an absolute Godsend during my senior year of high school. There was no one to help with all of those senior expenses, so Terri worked overtime to come up with the money for my hairdo and a $200 dollar dress for the prom. I will never forget how she fussed and cried over me that night and stood in the doorway waving, until she lost site of the car.

Over the many years, Terri has continued to amaze me. When I told her I wanted to elope in Las Vegas, she spent two weeks dragging me all over town getting everything I needed. It was her way of being a part of the wedding, since she could not make the trip. When I was 5 months pregnant with my daughter, I had to move away from home because of my husband's job. Terri gave me a huge baby shower before I left. On my baby's first Christmas, she drove from Detroit, MI to South Carolina, which was 13 hours, just to make Christmas special for us. When I separated from my husband and was having some financial difficulties, she borrowed money to help me until I got on my feet again. This was not too long after the birth of her second child and she was having money problems of her own. Last year, Terri drove to Atlanta Georgia, where I currently reside, to spend a whole week with us for Jordan's (my daughter) birthday. She helped plan and pay for the birthday party. She was the proudest and most loving grandmother ever.

Even though Terri now only works part-time while she finishes her nursing degree, she always saves a little extra money to send Jordan her holiday dress. She has bought all of her holiday dresses since she was born. My "Mommy" has fifteen and two year old daughters and I am still, "her baby". I am the eldest child that she constantly brags about. I'm the one she never forgets to send a birthday, Christmas or Mother's Day card to. Even though, sometimes, I forget to send her one. I thank God every day for blessing me with this amazing woman. She has been a part of my life for so long. I always forget that she did not bear me from her own womb. I have never been anything less than a full-blooded daughter to her. God couldn't have given me a better mom!

I start back to school July 5th, 2001 and I am a little scared. I will be a single mom, working a full-time job and taking a full course load in college. I know that I can do this because I've watched my mom overcome even the greatest odds. My mom has been my inspiration and is truly an unsung hero. I realize that I have written quite a few paragraphs, in her honor, but I could write a hundred more and never quite do her justice. I just wanted to tell her and the whole world how much she means to me. Thanks for all you do MOM! Much Love, Cheriees

About the author: