Feature Article
Preparing For Baby: Strategies, Tools and Tips for
First Time Grandmothers
by Theresa V. Wilson
Preparing for baby is
an exciting process that can be as unique as childbirth for first
time grandmothers. Once you recover from the initial shock that
your baby is no longer your baby, it’s time to get mentally
and physically prepared to offer proactive support to both mommy
and daddy from the beginning of the pre-birth process until the
end of the new mom’s recuperation phase. It is truly more
than preparing for baby showers, opening gifts, and recording
cards.
It all begins with the
announcement. From the moment you’re told you are about to
be a grandparent, nothing is the same. My husband and I received
our announcement on Christmas Day. Our daughter and son-in-law
came to the living room of their home to say “the test was
positive, congratulations grand mom”. A new life had
formed, a child was in the wings. The excitement is
indescribable. It is one of many times you realize that it is
only through the power of God that such a miracle would be
possible. The months of preplanning begins by encouraging the mom
to eat and sleep properly, initiate planning the baby shower with
save the date cards, helping to monitor gift registries and
coordinating materials that would be useful after the baby is
born. Even selection of what the mom and baby would wear on their
first trip home is reminiscent of the bridal planning
process.
There are several
issues, however, that are often overlooked during the preparation
phase. The future Grandmother needs to be proactive about getting
ready for the level of hands on input and support that will be
needed from her before, during, and after the birth. Essential
elements of grandmother preparation should include one of several
things:
Ø Watching your
diet, taking vitamins, starting an exercise program – you
could be “actively” involved in the birthing process.
I was part of the designated support team and, as such,
participated in the breathing exercises, hand holding and
offering the gentle conversations my daughter needed while
experiencing labor pains. In addition to singing songs, stroking
her head with a wet cloth throughout the process, I reminded her
of scripture verses that she could use as a source of her
strength including “I look beyond the hills from which
cometh my strength. My help comes from the Lord who made both
heaven and earth”. (Psalm 121:1-2 KJV) Being prepared with
a CD player or recorder for playing favorite her favorite music
and other inspirational messages can be very helpful in providing
comfort at the most strenuous moments. The Grandmother’s
role is pivotal for both the new mom and dad and she must be
physically up to the challenge even in early hours of the day.
The best time to get ready physically is before you are needed. A
nine month low impact aerobic or regular walking routine will
make a world of difference during a 10-20 hour labor.
Ø Taking time to
refresh your knowledge about pregnancy and birth –
Especially if you are going to be part of the child birthing
process, a brief refresher of what to expect would be helpful.
Your daughter will look to you at various points of the process
for your reassurance. It would be helpful if you are able to use
terminology she learned during the birthing preparation classes
to let her know you are aware of what she is experiencing and can
relate with up to date information.
Ø Setting aside
at least two to three weeks time – Being available to spend
or be on call to help the new mom during the recuperation and
adjustment period is an invaluable gift your daughter will never
forget. Sleep schedules, adjusting to feeding, doctor’s
appointments, stabilizing meal schedules, addressing unexpected
emergencies, doctor’s visits, and helping with general
lifestyle changes all make a difference between smooth and
traumatic transition. The significance of your presence during
this time cannot be measured.
Ø Scheduling
“readiness” packing--Do not wait until your daughter
is heading to the hospital to pack items as you may be asked to
stay with mom and dad at the hospital overnight. Be sure to
include dried fruit, juice, peppermints, and other light
refreshments you can use during break times. Our team took turns
sleeping and eating during the 17 hours my daughter was in labor.
We prepared a food kit that included toothbrush, wash cloth,
music for her comfort, and fresh fruit. Unfortunately, hospital
machines offer carbonated soda and potato chips that are
uninviting during the early morning hours.
Another preplanning
strategy you should consider is talking to the new mom and dad
about what they may need from you after birth of the child. Often
new parents don’t consider the need for help until the
issue arises. By initiating this conversation, new parents have
the option to consider whether there is a need for help for one
or two weeks to support a variety of issues including monitoring
phone calls and visitors, helping with home chores, washing
clothes, and preparing meals. These are a few of their favorite
things.
Participating in the
birth of your first grandbaby will mark a moment in your life
that can only be matched by your daughter’s birth. Your
role is different this time, but it is pivotal to the joy of your
daughter’s birthing experience. Congratulations
Grandma!!
About the
Author:> Theresa V. Wilson, M.Ed. is a Freelance Writer,
with over eighty bylines in several business, family and women on
and offline publications. She is owner of a home based business
dedicated to families and caregivers facing health recovery and
crisis related issues Theresa V. Wilson, M.Ed., Notary Public
President, VMAssociates, Inc.
Meeting The Needs Grief and Recovery Care
Providing grief support and self help health recovery materials
and resources for emotional and physical healing. We are a
company that offers resources focused on your recovery from
emotional trauma while encouraging your physical well being.
"Less About Product, More About Process"
http://www.meetingtheneeds.org/
1-800-659-8055 ext 5253
http://www.meetingtheneeds.org/
Also read:Little Things Mean Alot
(Stop bullying and tattling!) by
Ellie Braun-Haley
Read The Legend of the Tooth
Fairy by Nancy Wurtzel Founder of AllAboutBaby.com
Get Your Child Ready for School
by Caroline G. Shaw
Tools to Effectively Improve Your
Child's Behavior
by Mark Strobel, LCSW
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